Why are we still talking about women’s breasts and nipples? Does it really matter that Anne Hathaway’s nipples were showing? Shouldn’t the real conversation be about her skills as an actor? Shouldn’t we be talking about women in regards to their competency? Their mastery of their subject matter, their talents?
When the topic of ‘the nipples’ appeared on my Facebook page, one women commented that no one could take away a woman’s power–we were talking about the societal tendency to reduce women to sexual objects. I absolutely disagree with her. And, I agree in some regards. What happens when we talk about Hilary Clinton’s hair style, Angela Merkel’s cleavage or someone’s nipples? We may not be stripping them of their power, but the message is loud and clear–these women are just objects. We aren’t going to have a serious discussion about them as people–we’re going to analyze them in the most superficial of ways.
Who gives a Flying Fuck what Ms. Clinton’s hair looks like? She’s one of the most powerful people on the planet. Granted we do talk about Donald Trump’s hair, but in general the media rarely comment on a powerful man’s appearance. Because in our culture it doesn’t seem to matter how men look in relationship to their perceived authority or success. But women? Geez…
Let’s start talking about men’s bulges. Shall we? Can we talk about whether’s Boehner’s bad days are related to the size of his penis? Is it too small and therefore he’s unwilling to give up perceived power? Let’s start rating newscaster credibility in light of what color of tie they wear. I love Brain Williams–but, oh man… he’s wearing a purple tie?!
And, what about this guy? The one in the middle, in case you can’t tell. Hubba Hubba! (by the way he’s an award-winning Olympian.) Poor thing–he did get press coverage but it was all about whether he was sporting an (admirable) erection or not. You had to feel sorry for him having to defend his package instead of his Olympic performance.
So, yes it does go both ways–but not often enough.
Silly isn’t it. And frustrating. Double standards still surround us when it comes to talking about powerful, famous women. We diminish women, negate their accomplishments and perpetuate gender inequality when we engage in this kind of derogatory commentary about women.
And, much of the time it’s women who’re doing the criticizing.
Women are making huge strides in breaking into traditional male domains. We have a record number of women in Congress–there are 20 women in the 2013 Senate. But, we still get tripped up when some one shifts the conversation to her clothes, breasts, suspected weight gain, etc….
I propose that the next time you hear someone make a comment about a woman’s breasts you say, “Wow, did you see the bulge on Paul Ryan last week at _______. Amazing, I wonder what size shoes he wears.”
Walker: May I just say, AMEN? You know how I feel about this topic, and I love that you’re paying it forward. It’s time that we surface these issues and make people aware of them. Are people always putting women down when they comment on their physique? Maybe not. But when the comment is used in place of a comment about their skill or talent, then the intent is obvious. Thank you for bravely addressing this all too common issue!
You’re welcome. Let’s just keep talking about this. Til we’re blue in the face!
I may have been the only person who liked Anne Hathaway’s dress. I only watch the Oscars for the gowns, so, to me, talking about how the actresses dressed that evening is not inappropriate.
However, in general, I agree with you. There are more important things to talk about, and more important characteristics to discuss than a woman’s hair, weight, or breast size. Doing so is often a way of cutting them down, minimizing their contributions, or diverting attention away from their achievements.
Alas, when I listen to women talk about themselves, they’re often talking about their own appearance in the same way. I don’t think change will come easily.
Hi Ginger Kay,
Actually I thought the dress was attractive and yes, I agree that commentary on dresses is appropriate–but when it’s the only conversation and it becomes criticism or more than just “nice dress’ then it goes awry.
You’re right that women are self-critical. Maybe that’s the biggest piece of the issue? If women criticize other’s then they’re shifting the focus a little—but it’s all a shame, don’t you think?
Thanks for your thoughts.
Great piece Walker. Tough combination of self-criticism and patriarchy. I think it will take a major shift in consciousness about the feminine.
Thank you Amy. I agree that it will take a major shift…but we can keep trying!
Double standards everywhere, still, and I couldn’t agree more. And I also agree that women are worse than men in this regard, highly critical of the assets, attributes, attitudes and actions of other women.
Such a waste of time and talent.
(Did you see that Boob Study? Seriously???? Extraordinary that human beings (men?) throw away dollars and skills and time on these things.)
I did see the boob study-how sad that there are men who still feel the need to quantify ‘attractiveness’ by boob size or waist-breast ration!
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Walker, funny and so true. Remember all the news about Hilary Clinton’s pant suits and hair, and less about her accomplishments?
Haralee–I do and then the more recent flak about her hair and the absence of makeup in the last 6 months or so. It’s absurd and rather irritating!
So glad to see you!
I so agree with you on this, whether it’s for a man or a woman. I had to turn off the television the next day when they just droned on and on and on about the dresses. What about the movies and the acting??
My point as well! I don’t watch that kind of dribble on television for the most part. I learned about the dress/nipples thing through a friend’s HuffPost article!
I agree with your point, a woman’s accomplishments are far more interesting than the size of her breasts or the bounce of her booty – ditto men and their packages.
However, I also think that, especially in Hollywood, women go out of their way to draw attention to their “assets,” which can distract from their talents as actors sometimes. I don’t think Anne Hathaway’s nipples deserved the kind of attention they got, especially given her Oscar win that evening, but she, her stylist, her entire team, they must have realized that her dress would draw attention, both positive and negative.
I’m a little cynical about the intent of Hollywood movie stars…there’s no such thing as bad publicity in their world.
You make an excellent point when it comes to Hollywood! I hadn’t thought about that. The dress in question does indeed have very pointed darts—a throwback to the way dresses used to be all the time when we were younger.
Walker, you are so right in how much women’s appearances are noticed, regardless of what their profession is. Hilary Clinton’s or Katie Couric’s hairstyles are big news but who ever mentions how some of the male newscasters and politicians are not aging well? I will be laughing about your Paul Ryan suggestion all day. Thanks!!
Glad to offer something funny about Mr. Ryan. It’s not that I want to start demeaning men, but it does offer a nice way to counter the conversation…and sometimes the only way you can get someone to look at their comments/prejudices/judgments is through a redirect!
Walker,
I applaud you for tackling an issue near and dear to my heart. I have always despised the way the media encourages the public to view a woman’s body in lieu of her meteoric talents. It started long ago (think about the talents of Sophia Loren who is an incredible actress, yet men preferred to discuss his ample bosom) and continues today. We, the public, need to change that.
On another level, I also dislike having a men vs. women kind of attitude that we should do what “they” are doing by discussing the handsome Jon Hamm’s face or the perfect butt of Brad Pitt (don’t know if his is really all that great, but I can’t think of anyone else right now) to get even. All I’m saying is, in a perfect world we wouldn’t have to pit gender against gender.
I don’t know what the answer is other than starting anew with ourselves. You are right in writing about this. You have started a much-needed conversation on this subject. All of us, the over 50 women bloggers, need to keep our eye on the prize by writing about the talents and gifts people posses in their chosen fields and not on their G-d given, or plastic surgeon given, obvious attributes. I will not step off my pedestal now! Excellent post.
I agree with all points. I used the man reference to make my point, but I agree that we shouldn’t push the sex/looks point for either gender!