Here’s what I’m up to this month. As I write, outside on an unseasonably warm and sunny day, I see the geese coming out of the pond and spreading out across the common area in my townhouse community. Brilliant sun, with green grass and a very unseasonable cropping of soon-to-bloom daffodils in my little patch of garden.
I’m reading….Amor Towles’ Gentleman in Moscow. I admit to having a long time fascination with Russia, its history and people. Next up, James Baldwin and a few books on Portugal.
I’m listening to…Omar Sosa & Seckou Keita. I’m trying to expand my knowledge of other genres. Jazz music, Senegalese style. I’m also enjoying a Spotify playlist of favorites from Foy Vance.
I’m watching….Just finished The Young Pope on HBO. Bizarre. I’m going to have to watch it again. I don’t even have words to describe it. On a lighter note, I’ve been watching The Good Wife on Netflix. Watching a powerful female lead find her voice and her place in the world fits very nicely with what’s going on around us today.
Heading to….This week I purchased tickets for a trip to Portugal. This will be my very first international trip as a solo traveler. I have no plans as of yet, just a ticket, and a desire to spend 12 full days immersing myself in the sites and sounds…and tastes!
Sex Ramblings….I’m thinking about what happens when two people come together for the first time. The dance of intimacy. The necessary conversations and the fun ones. How lovers come to learn each other’s bodies, and wants and needs. Rhythms. Touch. The silly moments, the serious, what takes one’s breath away and what occasionally falls flat. There’s a lot of vulnerability in two older adults baring body and soul to each other. I talk often about the need for good communication–how it enhances the experience. Right now I’m testing that in my own life.
In a coaching session I was talking with a woman about what we don’t know about our bodies and sex as we age. Our bodies, our partners’ bodies. There isn’t an equivalent moment to “the” sex talk we have as budding teens (or don’t have!). And there is much we learn through trial and error. It’s easy to allow ourselves to be a bit terrified at the thoughts. But, really, if we’re present and asking for what we need it’s a pretty damned good thing.
Things I’m pondering….How we talk about aging in a way that affirms and expands possibility. There has to be something better–between the dread and often demeaning depictions of older adults, and the desperate marketing push around “youthful”? Because if you really look at it when we’re giving in to the urge to be more youthful we’re denying our own realities. There is no way to undo time. There is no way to erase who we are, the age of our bodies, yet we give in to the marketing push because we are driven by fear. What’s the best way to simply accept who we’ve become over the span of our lives and celebrate that?
What are you thinking about? Are there topics you want me to address in upcoming weeks?